Both the Stephen Ministry trainees and commissioned lay-ministers are currently studying in their separate sessions the art of listening, a most important skill in the caring process – and in everyday life.
Stephen Ministry teaches that in helping a care receiver grapple with an issue, the Stephen Minister encourages the person to keep thinking through and expressing ideas as he or she wrestles with a concern and eventually comes to a personal solution that is satisfactory. All the while, the Stephen Minister tries to be very attentive and to respect the care receiver’s thoughts, feelings, and decisions.
The Rev. Dr. Kenneth Haugk and Stephen Ministries, St. Louis associate, Joel Bretscher, recently wrote The Gift of Empathy which suggests to use the skill of empathy to deepen understanding, to strengthen trust, and to transform relationships in our everyday lives. They propose looking at the world from someone else’s perspective in order to experience what that person is feeling. Then they recommend that the listener express his or her understanding of those feelings back to that person. ‘Is that what you meant?’ “ Empathy focuses on one person connecting with and responding to another, in the moment, on a one to one basis,” writes the authors.
Both Stephen Ministry groups are involved in helping another person feel heard, valued, and understood.
What wonderful advice for our world today!
Submitted by Sue Kuhn, Stephen Leader